We know how hard it is to take that first step towards divorce.

It’s difficult for everyone, but for those who are stuck in an abusive or controlling relationship, it’s infinitely harder.

When going through a divorce, there are so many factors to consider, but when you fear for your own safety and that of your children, it puts a much larger burden on your shoulders.

Many individuals are so terrified of what could happen if they ever attempted to divorce their spouse, they simply remain in the abusive or controlling relationship.

It’s very common that the abused spouse becomes isolated from loved ones and harbors issues regarding their self-worth. Often, the abusive or controlling spouse will also use his or her financial power to force their husband or wife into becoming completely dependent upon them.

However, because the abusive or controlling spouse often appears to be very charming, loving and affectionate to the outside world, the abused spouse doubts that they’ll be believed if they ever came forward.

But we will always believe you.

After thirty-five years, we have seen it all. And we know that the persona many people show to the world is not always their true self.

So, the question is… what can be done?

Well, the most important issue is always the safety and welfare of you and your children. Typically, in these situations, the best course of action may be to obtain a restraining order, or protective order as they are typically referred to in Massachusetts.

If granted, this could prevent your spouse from:

  • Coming within a certain distance of you and/or your children
  • Showing up at your work place or your children’s school
  • Contacting you
  • Residing in the marital home
  • And more

If you are interested in obtaining a restraining order, our office is very experienced in handling such matters and would be happy to assist you through the process.

But what about protecting your financial welfare?

It is very common in divorce cases for one spouse to have more financial resources than the other, but it is especially prevalent in abuse cases, as many abusers control their spouses by preventing them from being financially dependent.

Luckily, upon filing for divorce, there are a variety of ways YOU CAN TAKE BACK YOUR FINANCIAL CONTROL!

Typically this is accomplished by filing a Motion for Temporary Orders, where you can ask the Court to enter orders while the divorce is ongoing. For example, you can ask the Court to:

  • Award temporary alimony and/or child support
  • Order your spouse to continue paying for your health insurance, car insurance, cell phone bill, etc.
  • Allow you to remain in the marital home and force your spouse to move out
  • Give you access to marital funds prior to the finalization of your divorce
  • And more

While it’s very common to feel that you have no options, nothing could be further from the truth! As you can see, there are many things that can be done in order to free you from your abusive or controlling relationship. At Foley & MacAdie, we will do everything we can to help you and your children through the difficult process of divorce, so you can move on to the next chapter of your life!

If you’re interested in learning more, please contact the office at 978-263-4160 for a free initial consultation. We look forward to hearing from you!